TRI NURAINI

On September 27th 2025, I had the honor of joining the 4th-anniversary celebration of the amazing community, Marukaii Supermoms! I’m so thankful to be invited to share a topic that is very close to my heart: “Loving Yourself in Marriage.”

Gathering with these amazing mothers is a reminder that in order to give, our own cup must be full first. This is the core foundation of a healthy and happy marriage: Self-love is not selfish.

Emptying the Cup for Transformation

The first step in self-love is observing our beliefs and mindset. We often carry old beliefs that actually weigh us down, such as: “A woman must always be independent and sacrifice in marriage,” or “My happiness isn’t important; my family comes first.”

It’s important for us to be aware of that beliefs and replace those old beliefs with ones that are more empowering such as,

• “I can be independent and receive support from my partner and others.”
• “If I am happy, my marriage is also happy.”
• “My happiness is just as important as everyone else’s.”

When our internal beliefs are strong, we are able to create “The Full Cup of Love” that overflows.

Three Simple Practices to Love Yourself

How can we practically begin filling our own cup of love? Here are three simple and fundamental practices:

1. Schedule Your Me-Time 🛀 Self-love means taking care of yourself. This can be a hobby, rest, reflection, or journaling. Remember, there is always time for everything—we just need to schedule it and commit to it.
2. Practice Self-Appreciation ✨ Give yourself compliments and celebrate your personal achievements, no matter how small. Shifting your focus from “what is lacking” to “what is abundant” can drastically change your relationships, both with yourself and your partner.
3. Practice Self-Compassion & Forgiveness 💖 We are human. Making mistakes is part of the experience. Learn to forgive yourself more gently. You can even try writing a Forgiveness Letter to yourself, and from there, reflect and take all the valuable lesson.

The Greatest Gift: Gratitude and Presence

To strengthen the connection in your marriage, practice Gratitude and Presence.

• Gratitude: Start a Gratitude Journal and appreciate your personal achievement. And more, your partner’s efforts, even the smallest ones. Changing your focus from the perceived flaws to what you are thankful for is transformative.
• Presence: In a world full of distractions, being fully present for your partner and family is the most precious gift. Try to disconnect to connect: put your phone away when you are with your partner, and listen with your heart—paying attention not just to their words, but also to their emotions.

Self-love is the foundation that allows you to give generously without feeling depleted.

I hope we can all embrace this practice so that we can be better women, wives and mothers, constantly learning and thriving. Let’s keep filling our cups everyday!

I’m wondering, which of these three practices is the one you need to prioritize this week?

My wish for you is that you love yourself even more deeply and share even more love to the world.

You are meant to thrive.

And if you ever need any support, I’m here for you. Always. ❤️

I’ve got your back. 

With love and gratitude,
Inuk